An Unexpected Partnership

Facilitating a support group and conducting group psychotherapy require similar skills. For both interventions, the leader encourages constructive interactions between group members in the service of psychological growth. However, there are important distinctions between these two types of groups that impact the relationship between the leader(s) and participants. In group psychotherapy, traditional therapeutic rules apply: Patients receive mental health treatment for a diagnosed condition and are charged a fee for that care; the therapist and patients commit to maintaining the confidentiality of disclosures in the group; and records are kept for medical and legal purposes. In contrast, a support group is not considered formal psychotherapy. Consequently, less stringent rules apply. This distinction influenced how we conducted the Single Fathers Due to Cancer support group. The men were not our patients and we were not their therapists. We were therefore able to partner with them in ways that would not have been possible otherwise. From the beginning, a collaborative spirit defined our work with the fathers. The seeds of partnership were sown during the very first meeting when we welcomed their input and, in response to their feedback, altered both the structure and format of group meetings. In the months and years that followed, our partnership expanded and yielded unexpected benefits for us, the men, and countless other widowed fathers. A quick search of the Internet or any bookstore reveals an abundance of resources for people grieving the loss of a loved one. However, there is remarkably little tailored specifically for widowed fathers. Researchers in the grief and bereavement fields have also largely neglected the challenges these men face. As our work with the fathers in the support group continued and intensified, we felt compelled to bring more attention to this underappreciated clinical need. Our first instinct was to approach this subject academically and we drafted two manuscripts for professional journals. In the first paper, we aimed to raise awareness among our colleagues in the cancer and bereavement communities by highlighting the unique hardships of being a widowed father.