Straight Culture
The men interviewed considered straightness as an identity, a way of life, or a community. Identifying as straight meant they could continue relationships with their women partners, children, extended family, friends, and other people in their straight communities, relationships they did not think possible with a gay or bisexual identity. It also meant they could avoid stigma and could feel connected to a socially dominant group. In terms of identity, having sex with men was largely irrelevant. They were not “closeted” gay or bisexual men. They identified as straight. In short, the men interviewed were secretive about their sex with men, not their identities. Embeddedness in heterosexual culture reinforces their straight identity, regardless of the fact that they might have sex with men. Key straight institutions described by the men interviewed included their childhood families of origin; religion; school or youth sports; and the families they formed as adults. Most felt that part of a straight man’s life in a rural area or small town was being a husband or father and found great meaning in this. Not coincidentally, many also perceived partnerships with women or childrearing as central to their straight and masculine identities.