The wisdom of delay

In schools, the volume and frequency of questions and deci­sions can be smothering on some days. With fast- paced inqui­ries and lickety- split decisions, we may forget the value and necessity of pausing. • “I’ll get back to you about that.” • “Let me think about how I want to respond.” • “Tomorrow I’ll let you know what the consequences will be.” • “I’ll consider your request and let you know of my decision.” Replying immediately is not always a good idea. Whether react­ing to a proposal, an infraction, or a critical remark, delaying our reply can be wise. Of course, there are times when a delay may be inappropri­ate or ineffective. One way to choose is to take three seconds to decide whether a situation or a person is demanding an imme­diate response. Then make a judgment about how to offer the best response. • In response to a co- worker’s request to change a schedule or delay a project: “Let me consider what is involved with that change, and I’ll let you know shortly.” • A parent notifies you that her child will miss an upcoming, required event: “I’m startled to hear that. I want to consider the implications before I give you my response.” • An administrator expects you to discontinue your beloved annual school program: “This comes as a shock. I want to have a conversation about this, but not right now. I’ll make an appointment for tomorrow.” Brief postponement of a response can offer the strength of a deep breath, the perspective of further query, and the potential of a calm, reasoned rejoinder. Whether our delay is twenty- four minutes or twenty- four hours, we take time to craft our response. And we often feel the vivid sense of strength, centeredness, and power that results. For self- preservation, as well as fair- mindedness and even­handedness toward others, consider the wisdom of delay. Hesitation can have its benefits.