Making Workplace Flexibility Work

Chapter 6 focuses on the topic of flexible work arrangements. Workplace flexibility is often romanticized as an answer to all the challenges working mothers face. While flexibility can be particularly helpful to working mothers as they integrate work and family, it also introduces new complexities working mothers need to consider. This chapter helps women develop a more comprehensive understanding of workplace flexibility. We start with an overview of the different types of flexibility and some of the benefits and challenges women have experienced with these varied work arrangements. We go on to introduce strategies women can put in place to take advantage of a flexible work arrangement and to ensure they are negotiating workplace flexibility in such a way that they don’t trade flexibility for compensation.

Older, Wiser, But Still a Working Mother

Chapter 5 considers how working mothers navigate work and family as they move from the daily responsibilities of raising children to parenting adult children to retirement. As working mothers’ parenting role shifts in conjunction with midlife changes, they may begin a process of career recalibration as they consider what they want to do that is meaningful and engaging in this next life phase. The varied ways working mothers approach this issue is a key focus of this chapter. We go on to discuss some of the late-stage transitions women may experience, including grown children returning home and leaving paid work permanently. Each of these experiences presents women with new choices as they craft the final chapters of their work/life paths.

Epilogue

While women have made great strides in the workplace over the last several decades, it is far too early to declare victory. Women still hold a disproportionately small number of executive level positions and high-growth entrepreneurial ventures. Although many factors contribute to this lag, the key issue that we have focused on in this book is the persistent expectation that working mothers must choose between being “ideal” mothers and “ideal” workers. Consequently, women have become consumed with how to best manage the intersection of work and family while trying not to succumb to the outdated gendered norms and expectations or neglect their families. Regardless of the type of work, parenting stage, or family situation, working mothers are often troubled about not being able to put 100% into either role. We have described many moments that lead women to begin to question who they are, what is important to them, and whether they want to or how they will blend work and family. In contrast with many other books, we do not believe that work and family should be an either/or proposition. “Having it all” is unattainable only when we allow societal or organizational influences to dictate what “having it all” means. What is required is a fundamental shift away from letting others prescribe how to blend work and family to allowing individuals to construct their own definitions of being “good” working mothers. When guided by their own values and needs rather than by gendered assumptions, individual ...

The Evolution of Work and Family

In Chapter 4, we move beyond the first-time experiences of early motherhood to consider how life as a working mother shifts as a family structure evolves. There has been a predominant focus on pregnancy and women’s initial transition to becoming a working mother, yet as children age and careers shift, working mothers face new work and home decisions. This next series of transitions differ from those of early motherhood. While the anxiety and uncertainty of “will I be a good working mother?” may have diminished, working mothers often face increased complexity associated with managing a household with multiple children. At the same time, women may be experiencing more pressure to take on new opportunities in their careers. In exploring how women manage these competing pressures, we focus on how women can lean on relationships within the family, at work, and in the community to forge their positive path.

Nine Months and Counting

Chapter 2 explores the foundations of working motherhood as women become pregnant and begin to negotiate professional and mothering roles as they disclose their pregnancies at work and prepare for maternity leave. We discuss three significant adjustments most women experience as they begin to integrate pregnancy and work. The first is a psychological adjustment that starts as a pregnant woman begins to envision her future identity as a working mother. The second adjustment is a physical one that stems from how a woman copes with her changing body in the workplace. The last adjustment is an interpersonal one and relates to how a pregnant woman manages interactions with her boss and her colleagues. We explore various ways women navigate these adjustments and how they set women up for positively integrating work and motherhood.

Envisioning the Future as a Working Mother

Chapter 1 begins before a woman even becomes pregnant. Many women spend years focusing on building a career, taking the time to build essential human capital skills that make them valuable resources in the workforce. However, there comes a time when most women begin to think actively about their future and determine whether or not that includes having children. When women have built a career and a personal life that they find satisfying, it becomes hard to imagine how children can be integrated into the mix. In this chapter we explore questions women often have at this important juncture in life, including: How does having a baby impact a woman’s career? How much does it cost to have a child? How does having a baby affect personal freedom?

Career Paths that Twist and Turn

Chapter 7 moves beyond workplace flexibility to consider career flexibility, which refers to the varied career choices working mothers make as they pursue their work/life path. We begin by introducing a more expansive view of career beyond the traditional career ladder. This holistic career model encompasses work, family, and community interests and activity. This career metaphor more accurately fits the reality of today’s workplace for men and women. It also gives working mothers authority to consider something beyond the next promotion as they construct their careers. We then go into more depth on two of the more prominent twists working mothers make: taking time off from paid work and starting their own business. We focus on the tactics working mothers can use to ensure that these options fit with their work/family interests.

Becoming a Working Mother

Chapter 3 covers the transition to the postnatal period. We focus first on the experience of maternity leave and some of the factors that help and hinder new mothers in the process of becoming confident about being good mothers. We consider the varied ways women go about managing their maternity leave both in terms of work and at home and the questions to ask oneself about how to best manage this time given one’s own work and family circumstances. We then turn our attention to the initial return-to-work period. We explore how women can work with their managers, their partners, and caregivers to establish new routines at work and at home that support their new lives as working mothers.

Allies, Not Enemies

Chapter 9 focuses on the important role men can play in supporting women as they create positive paths through work and motherhood. While we have talked about men at home and at work in previous chapters, this is an important enough topic that it warrants a specific chapter. We begin by discussing the benefits for mothers, children, and fathers when men are caregiving partners. Like women, men are beginning to approach their careers differently, with greater interest in making space for life outside of work. Men face different challenges and opportunities when they integrate fatherhood and work. Women need to be aware of these differences as they look to their partners to support their work/life path. Finally, we turn our attention to the workplace and how men can act as allies and support working mothers at work. To get this support from men, women need to give support—a topic we discuss throughout this chapter.

What to Expect from the Unexpected in Work and Family Life

Chapter 8 introduces the more common life disruptions working mothers may experience. These disruptions include navigating one’s own health and well-being, managing situations with one’s children or spouse, and responding to unexpected caregiving responsibilities with one’s extended family. Unfortunately, these disruptions occur more frequently than most women expect, which is why this chapter is particularly important. We explore life disruptions that relate to the working mother herself, her nuclear family, and her extended family as we introduce ways women can get support at home and at work to manage these disruptions. We hope that by raising the unexpected and sometimes undiscussed aspects of navigating work and life, we can help working mothers become a bit more prepared for tackling these unexpected transitions.