Abstract
This article presents an individual parental coaching model (IPC) designed and examined for a PhD dissertation. Here we shall examine one aspect from the PhD, which explores the connection and influence that this IPC model has on the ‘teenager-parent’ relationship.
Essentially, the research had two main goals, firstly to examine the possible influence of a unique parental coaching process, with respect to the parents’ ability to form better connections and communication with their adolescent children. Furthermore, it sought to validate a certain perception of parenting - the notion that a parent must first establish a firm sense of “self” before taking part in parenting, thus self-definition, purpose and meaning, are the individual’s significant guidelines when establishing relations with others, especially the demanding relations with teenagers.
This was a qualitative narrative piece of research, since the parents’ life stories, as perceived and related by them, were at the core of this research. Seven Israeli families participated; heterosexual married couples who had raised at least one teenager between the ages of 13 to 18. The parents took an active part in a comprehensive coaching process consisting of ten weekly sessions. While the teenagers took part in an indirect manner, by filling out questionnaires. The data collected during the coaching sessions and open interviews were analyzed using the “Theme Analysis” method. This revealed some prominent individual and parental issues that contemporary Israeli parents had to deal with.
The results indicated the following central findings, apart from the parent’s appreciation of the opportunity to enter a deep process of ‘self-encounter’, resulting in great benefits despite the challenges along the way. The finding’s below address both the research question itself and the explicit change process in the communication and connection between the parents and their teenagers from both perspectives. Improvements included spending more time together, less anger and friction, more patience and tolerance, better awareness to discourse style and word choices plus an overall improvement in the atmosphere at home. All the participating parents without exception stated that it was a worthy journey, which they would recommend to all parents to experience.