We expect a lot from strangers, for instance, that the valet guy doesn’t steal our wheels, that the babysitter doesn’t abduct our children, and that the barista at Starbucks doesn’t poison our white chocolate mocha. But romantic relationships, friendships, parent-child relationships, and other varieties of intimate relationships introduce a whole new dimension to what we expect and demand of each other. It’s against the backdrop of our intimate relationships that we sign prenups, make custody agreements, write wills, and open joint bank accounts. But most of our interactions in intimate settings are shaped not by contractual agreements but by our preferences, core values, and prior expectations about how other people should behave. No wonder people embark on relationships with clashing concepts of what count as oversights, slights, betrayals, and unforgivable sins. Our differing expectations, preferences, and core values create ample opportunities for misunderstandings to arise and wreak havoc. It is not surprising, then, that antagonistic emotions, such as disrespect, resentment, hate, and contempt, are commonplace in intimate settings. But, as we will see, they are not equally toxic. Our intimate relationships can survive the torments of hate and resentment, but they crumple under the weight of disrespect and contempt.