Modern marriages in the towns of Dagestan are based primarily on mutual sympathy of young people or are a kind of agreement between parents and children. Young people try not to ignore the role of older relatives in this matter. And even if young people marry with respect to the choice of their parents or religious norms, older relatives tend to acquaint the young people and find out their sympathy towards each other. That is, they try to take into account the opinion of the young people entering into marriage. Modern young people have more opportunities to get acquainted and know each another than it was in the past. Most often young people get acquainted in universities, at work, meet via mutual friends or relatives, etc. Like it was in the past, the main motive of premarital meetings and courtship is the intention to marry, to create a family. In modern youth’s opinion, the basis for marriage is love or mutual sympathy, respect, social status and religious beliefs. The initiative mainly comes from the young man or from his relatives. But it sometimes happens that a certain girl is offered to the young man’s family. If the man or his relatives are not satisfied with the proposed candidate, they try to refuse tactfully. According to the obligations of etiquette, the girl should also tactfully reject the candidate she dislikes. As before, household skills, accuracy and cleanliness, femininity, respect for elders, chastity are valued in the future bride nowadays, people pay attention to her modesty, manners and, of course, beauty. Such requirements as discipline, restraint, respectful attitude towards elders, absence of bad habits, neat appearance, ability to behave in the society, responsibility, efficiency, etc. are often applied to the young man.
V. Bryusov’s Letters to His Fiancée
